Filial Piety
This is a huge concept in Korea. This is the Japanese version.
The Warrior’s Filial Piety – Honoring Your Parents and Ancestors
Most cultures have a version of what is called filial piety which represents the concept of honoring your parents and ancestors; and in the martial arts culture your teacher, your sempai or those senior to you, as well as your kohai or those lower than you.
Basically, filial piety means to be good to one’s parents; to take care of one’s parents; to engage in good conduct not just towards parents but also outside the home so as to bring a good name to one’s parents and ancestors; to perform the duties of one’s job well so as to obtain the material means to support parents as well as carry out sacrifices to the ancestors; not be rebellious, show love, respect and support; display courtesy; ensure male heirs, uphold fraternity among brothers; wisely advise one’s parents, including dissuading them from moral unrighteousness; and display sorrow for their sickness and death.
This concept is carried on in the martial arts school, as a Sensei (One Who Walked Before) is seen as a father figure and the grandmaster is seen more like a grandfather.
Many schools today have drifted into the world of modern sport and yet classical arts that have been handed down for thousands of years are very deep in protocol and manners where a student can show respect and honor. Here are a few guidelines from my notes as to the correct way of behaving for the classical martial artist.
1. Always honor one’s family, and give without the expectation of receiving. Strive for family honor. It is a lifetime responsibility.
2. Second to one’s family, honor your teacher. They are to be treated like a father or mother who gave you the art of life. Give and sacrifice ‘without the expectation of receiving. It is a lifetime responsibility for one’s official teacher.
3. Treat your fellow students as a brother or sister. By giving and helping them to be better, in truth this will strengthen yourself.
4. Senior students, be humble. Treat junior students (kohai) as equals, thus, enabling you to have the respect and position of a senior.
5. Junior students, be respectful to your senior (Sempai). Their treatment of you as an equal is a sign that they are starting to understand deeper knowledge and are worthy of senior respect. This humbleness is to be respected. It is said, the stalk of rice with the most fruit bows the lowest.
6. Never consider yourself knowledgeable, regardless of time in training. We are only on a staircase that is very long and with no apparent end. The most advanced martial artist will empty their cup and become a white belt as any time.
7. Recognize that everyone will have strengths greater than yourself and weaknesses, regardless of their time in the art. Try to help their weaknesses. In time your weaknesses will be eventually strengthened. Never be afraid to admit you do not know.
8. Senior students are responsible to demonstrate the “code of ethics” in and out of class. This example shows that you yourself don’t consider your art separate from your everyday life, that it is part of everything. This demonstrates the strength of your art and makes good practitioners and teachers.
9. Rely on your teacher’s judgment as best as one can. Many times you may not agree with policies, or actions, but it is your responsibility to stand behind them and strive for better understanding as junior students do towards you. Remember one is just on a step or a path and possibly the next step will give you better understanding of the overall journey.
10. Remember teachers are human. They make mistakes and have human problems like anyone else. Realize that no one will be a perfect example. It is this kindness and understanding that makes you strong by respecting this humanness and appreciating their gains of self-perfection in one’s total-ness. ”
11. Be an example of courtesy, regardless of what step you are on in your growth. Courtesy in and out of class is a sign of strength. By giving courtesy, you get courtesy and respect. Use yes ma’am and no ma’am, yes sir and no sir, never calling a senior by their first name is an example of courtesy.
12. Empty your cup of tea. Allow criticism and suggestions by anyone. Students who often have less time in can offer suggestions or catch something that is very true and helpful, if you are open. Remembering that we are an equal human beings helps. Thinking we know a lot, means we know little.
13. Never openly criticize your teacher. Hold your doubts or criticisms to yourself and possibly your view will change later on the matter. Criticizing back to your teacher says you are their equal in knowledge. This is considered very poor code and essentially you need another teacher. In the old days this was dealt with very strictly, today these actions will simply result in a student being asked to leave.
14. Don’t think of criticism as personal. Criticism is only suggestions or sharing to gain better refinement from outside eyes. This is the reason to take classes in the first place. Teachers are no different and need criticism from their seniors to grow. Without self-examination created by suggestions or criticism, one is no better off than reading a book. We need other eyes to tell the real story.
15. Pride. Carry yourself earnestly; try your best even if it’s not up to your expectations. Disregard other people’s expectations of yourself. Doing your best for yourself gives you honor and pride.
16. Practice to contain one’s ego. Approach practice with a smile and from that you will get better at it. Containment of one’s ego is essential for proper energy and total-ness. Remember proper energy is sharing and not competitive unless you make it so.
17. The showing of too much power in any joint exercises shows you have low-level ego containment. Use of technique with kindness and appreciation is a sign of strength. To intimidate others is low level. Demonstrate containment; this is a sign of strength. It is a personal test to try not to get even when someone betters you. Compliment them. Do not feel degraded by being bettered. Appreciate this as being personally helpful. They are giving you something to work on for the future. Like iron wrapped in cotton, the true warrior is gentle unless needed to be rough.
18. Tenacity. It is your responsibility to try your best in all classes. Do not allow your self to just follow or stand idle. Practice yourself, regardless of your grasp or ability of the technique. It is your responsibility to not complain of tiredness or your ability to do the practice. Tenacity is the ability to keep trying with or without the teacher. By doing this you will always feel better when you leave, and you will gather honor and respect. Idleness means idle instruction in return. One reason you take instruction is to practice tenacity of learning.
19. Cleanliness. Refined cleanliness means refined mind. Clean clothes and body show by example the honor and ethics you hold.
20. Never ask for more knowledge or to be able to test for a new rank. Let the teachers decide when you are ready. To ask is a sign that you have down what has already been given you. Remember any knowledge has a lifetime of perfecting. By working hard on what you have is the first sign that you are getting ready for more and deserve it. (In modern organizations, and in a mastermind or coaching atmosphere, this asking for what’s next or for additional resources is common)
21. Always remember your teacher’s birthday, black belt testing, Christmas, etc. Give them some gift of appreciation from your heart no matter how small. This sign of thoughtfulness and respect allows a bond that makes the teacher feel appreciated, and usually they reciprocate by genuinely wanting to further your knowledge from this appreciation. A true Sensei is a teacher for life.
22. If you are far away from your teacher and you visit them or any other teachers, it is proper to bring them a small gift each time. This can be food for casual visits or presents suitable for more important visits. This is traditionally important. In Kojosho Kempo, the most precious gift of all is when your teacher bends over and picks up a stone off the ground and hands it to you in recognition of your achieving your highest level.
23. If you have had a falling out with your teacher, but want to reestablish your connection, it is most important to bring a gift upon your “first” contact and to give your humble apology, regardless of whether you feel it is totally deserved. A good teacher will always accept a good apology regardless if they feel they were wrong or you were wrong. “Saving face” most times does not allow the teacher the flexibility of the student. Traditionally a teacher must follow protocol which is not understood by the student until years later.
24. Anytime one invites the teacher over to their home or anywhere else, it is essential that there is always food and drink available. This shows good manners and respect.
These rules may seem a little much for the average civilian, but in the land of true warriors filled with alpha male types, it is important that we learn and teach methods of behavior in every way we can. In America, we teach our young men to honor the women of the organization by opening doors, standing when a lady leaves a table, etc. Chivalry is alive and well in the warrior’s house. Like a sheepdog caring for his herd and ever vigilant against wolves of all kinds, the senior and advance warriors take that position of protection any time they sense a threat. Likewise, the juniors help and defend the alpha seniors and make sure they always have their back, and through actions and deeds demonstrate their loyalty and dedication.
Terry Bryan, American Black Belt Academy
The Warrior’s Filial Piety – Honoring Your Parents and Ancestors
Most cultures have a version of what is called filial piety which represents the concept of honoring your parents and ancestors; and in the martial arts culture your teacher, your sempai or those senior to you, as well as your kohai or those lower than you.
Basically, filial piety means to be good to one’s parents; to take care of one’s parents; to engage in good conduct not just towards parents but also outside the home so as to bring a good name to one’s parents and ancestors; to perform the duties of one’s job well so as to obtain the material means to support parents as well as carry out sacrifices to the ancestors; not be rebellious, show love, respect and support; display courtesy; ensure male heirs, uphold fraternity among brothers; wisely advise one’s parents, including dissuading them from moral unrighteousness; and display sorrow for their sickness and death.
This concept is carried on in the martial arts school, as a Sensei (One Who Walked Before) is seen as a father figure and the grandmaster is seen more like a grandfather.
Many schools today have drifted into the world of modern sport and yet classical arts that have been handed down for thousands of years are very deep in protocol and manners where a student can show respect and honor. Here are a few guidelines from my notes as to the correct way of behaving for the classical martial artist.
1. Always honor one’s family, and give without the expectation of receiving. Strive for family honor. It is a lifetime responsibility.
2. Second to one’s family, honor your teacher. They are to be treated like a father or mother who gave you the art of life. Give and sacrifice ‘without the expectation of receiving. It is a lifetime responsibility for one’s official teacher.
3. Treat your fellow students as a brother or sister. By giving and helping them to be better, in truth this will strengthen yourself.
4. Senior students, be humble. Treat junior students (kohai) as equals, thus, enabling you to have the respect and position of a senior.
5. Junior students, be respectful to your senior (Sempai). Their treatment of you as an equal is a sign that they are starting to understand deeper knowledge and are worthy of senior respect. This humbleness is to be respected. It is said, the stalk of rice with the most fruit bows the lowest.
6. Never consider yourself knowledgeable, regardless of time in training. We are only on a staircase that is very long and with no apparent end. The most advanced martial artist will empty their cup and become a white belt as any time.
7. Recognize that everyone will have strengths greater than yourself and weaknesses, regardless of their time in the art. Try to help their weaknesses. In time your weaknesses will be eventually strengthened. Never be afraid to admit you do not know.
8. Senior students are responsible to demonstrate the “code of ethics” in and out of class. This example shows that you yourself don’t consider your art separate from your everyday life, that it is part of everything. This demonstrates the strength of your art and makes good practitioners and teachers.
9. Rely on your teacher’s judgment as best as one can. Many times you may not agree with policies, or actions, but it is your responsibility to stand behind them and strive for better understanding as junior students do towards you. Remember one is just on a step or a path and possibly the next step will give you better understanding of the overall journey.
10. Remember teachers are human. They make mistakes and have human problems like anyone else. Realize that no one will be a perfect example. It is this kindness and understanding that makes you strong by respecting this humanness and appreciating their gains of self-perfection in one’s total-ness. ”
11. Be an example of courtesy, regardless of what step you are on in your growth. Courtesy in and out of class is a sign of strength. By giving courtesy, you get courtesy and respect. Use yes ma’am and no ma’am, yes sir and no sir, never calling a senior by their first name is an example of courtesy.
12. Empty your cup of tea. Allow criticism and suggestions by anyone. Students who often have less time in can offer suggestions or catch something that is very true and helpful, if you are open. Remembering that we are an equal human beings helps. Thinking we know a lot, means we know little.
13. Never openly criticize your teacher. Hold your doubts or criticisms to yourself and possibly your view will change later on the matter. Criticizing back to your teacher says you are their equal in knowledge. This is considered very poor code and essentially you need another teacher. In the old days this was dealt with very strictly, today these actions will simply result in a student being asked to leave.
14. Don’t think of criticism as personal. Criticism is only suggestions or sharing to gain better refinement from outside eyes. This is the reason to take classes in the first place. Teachers are no different and need criticism from their seniors to grow. Without self-examination created by suggestions or criticism, one is no better off than reading a book. We need other eyes to tell the real story.
15. Pride. Carry yourself earnestly; try your best even if it’s not up to your expectations. Disregard other people’s expectations of yourself. Doing your best for yourself gives you honor and pride.
16. Practice to contain one’s ego. Approach practice with a smile and from that you will get better at it. Containment of one’s ego is essential for proper energy and total-ness. Remember proper energy is sharing and not competitive unless you make it so.
17. The showing of too much power in any joint exercises shows you have low-level ego containment. Use of technique with kindness and appreciation is a sign of strength. To intimidate others is low level. Demonstrate containment; this is a sign of strength. It is a personal test to try not to get even when someone betters you. Compliment them. Do not feel degraded by being bettered. Appreciate this as being personally helpful. They are giving you something to work on for the future. Like iron wrapped in cotton, the true warrior is gentle unless needed to be rough.
18. Tenacity. It is your responsibility to try your best in all classes. Do not allow your self to just follow or stand idle. Practice yourself, regardless of your grasp or ability of the technique. It is your responsibility to not complain of tiredness or your ability to do the practice. Tenacity is the ability to keep trying with or without the teacher. By doing this you will always feel better when you leave, and you will gather honor and respect. Idleness means idle instruction in return. One reason you take instruction is to practice tenacity of learning.
19. Cleanliness. Refined cleanliness means refined mind. Clean clothes and body show by example the honor and ethics you hold.
20. Never ask for more knowledge or to be able to test for a new rank. Let the teachers decide when you are ready. To ask is a sign that you have down what has already been given you. Remember any knowledge has a lifetime of perfecting. By working hard on what you have is the first sign that you are getting ready for more and deserve it. (In modern organizations, and in a mastermind or coaching atmosphere, this asking for what’s next or for additional resources is common)
21. Always remember your teacher’s birthday, black belt testing, Christmas, etc. Give them some gift of appreciation from your heart no matter how small. This sign of thoughtfulness and respect allows a bond that makes the teacher feel appreciated, and usually they reciprocate by genuinely wanting to further your knowledge from this appreciation. A true Sensei is a teacher for life.
22. If you are far away from your teacher and you visit them or any other teachers, it is proper to bring them a small gift each time. This can be food for casual visits or presents suitable for more important visits. This is traditionally important. In Kojosho Kempo, the most precious gift of all is when your teacher bends over and picks up a stone off the ground and hands it to you in recognition of your achieving your highest level.
23. If you have had a falling out with your teacher, but want to reestablish your connection, it is most important to bring a gift upon your “first” contact and to give your humble apology, regardless of whether you feel it is totally deserved. A good teacher will always accept a good apology regardless if they feel they were wrong or you were wrong. “Saving face” most times does not allow the teacher the flexibility of the student. Traditionally a teacher must follow protocol which is not understood by the student until years later.
24. Anytime one invites the teacher over to their home or anywhere else, it is essential that there is always food and drink available. This shows good manners and respect.
These rules may seem a little much for the average civilian, but in the land of true warriors filled with alpha male types, it is important that we learn and teach methods of behavior in every way we can. In America, we teach our young men to honor the women of the organization by opening doors, standing when a lady leaves a table, etc. Chivalry is alive and well in the warrior’s house. Like a sheepdog caring for his herd and ever vigilant against wolves of all kinds, the senior and advance warriors take that position of protection any time they sense a threat. Likewise, the juniors help and defend the alpha seniors and make sure they always have their back, and through actions and deeds demonstrate their loyalty and dedication.
Terry Bryan, American Black Belt Academy
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